Difference between revisions of "AskedToLeave"
(Resolved) |
|||
(22 intermediate revisions by 8 users not shown) | |||
Line 1: | Line 1: | ||
− | + | {{conflictresolution}} | |
+ | {{headerbox}}'''Ask To Leave Policy:''' If someone behaves in a way that makes you feel unsafe or attempts at diffusing an argument fail and it escalates, you can ask a person to leave. | ||
+ | * '''COOPERATING IS EXCELLENT:''' It is excellent of someone asked to leave to cooperate to diffuse things till it can be discussed and resolved later when people are calmer. | ||
+ | * '''BACKING SOMEONE UP:''' If someone asks for someone to leave, even if you don't understand the reasons, it is usually excellent to back the person asking up and to take the person asked aside to diffuse the face-to-face conflict between them. | ||
+ | * '''REASSURING THOSE ASKED:''' Reassure the person being asked that it is considered excellent to leave when asked. It counts in your favor. Cooperation shows consideration for keeping the space peaceful and you can request [[Mediation]] to provide neutral [[Conflict Resolution]] support to try to clear whatever happened up later. | ||
+ | * You can read out the basic [[AskedToLeave]] policy if anyone is confused about it and give them this page link to read for themselves: | ||
− | + | 1. If you're in an argument with somebody that seems irresolvable and | |
− | + | looks like it's escalating beyond attempts at dropping it or [[Conflict Resolution]], you or they can ask the other to leave. | |
− | + | It's okay for both sides to do that, because that gets the confrontation out of the space, and gives time for people to calm down. | |
− | |||
− | |||
− | + | 2. It's considered excellent to leave. It counts in your favor. | |
− | + | 3. Not leaving isn't excellent, because at that point at least one | |
− | + | person is stuck in an immediately intractable problem. | |
− | + | 4. Neither is it excellent to leave, and coming back before resolving | |
− | + | the conflict. | |
+ | More clarifying points 5-7 on this follow. | ||
+ | {{boxend}} | ||
− | + | See also: | |
− | + | * [[Unexcellent]] - A page to link to people (noisebridge.net/unexcellent) as you're walking them to the door after asking them to leave | |
− | + | * [[Conflict Resolution]] | |
− | + | * [[Mediation]] | |
− | + | * [[Community Standards]] | |
− | + | * [[86]] - a list of people that are no longer welcome at Noisebridge | |
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | ' | ||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | [[ | ||
==Guidelines== | ==Guidelines== | ||
− | (Here's some perspective excerpted from the Noisebridge mailing list ...) | + | (Here's some perspective excerpted from the Noisebridge mailing list ...)<br> |
− | + | <br> | |
+ | (This guidance was updated to concur with post-Noisebridge-Reboot policies. Historically, many community problems were handled at our weekly Tuesday meetings, but these discussions became too drama-filled, and we now use other methods. Please see the links, above, for our current ways of handling problems.)<br> | ||
+ | <br> | ||
https://www.noisebridge.net/pipermail/noisebridge-discuss/2013-March/034846.html | https://www.noisebridge.net/pipermail/noisebridge-discuss/2013-March/034846.html | ||
<pre> | <pre> | ||
− | [...] one of the reasons why the Noisebridge tradition has emerged | + | [...] one of the reasons why the Noisebridge tradition has emerged |
− | over the | + | over the years of asking people to leave is to defuse immediate |
− | + | situations. It doesn't mean anything more than some matter has arisen | |
− | than some matter has arisen that the people involved feel uncomfortable | + | that the people involved feel uncomfortable handling on their own, |
− | handling on their own, and would rather discuss it with the wider | + | and would rather discuss it with the wider community. |
− | community. | ||
− | It's not intended as a punishment. Indeed, if one feels outraged that | + | It's not intended as a punishment. Indeed, if one feels outraged that |
− | one will have to spend a maximum of seven days not at Noisebridge, I do | + | one will have to spend a maximum of seven days not at Noisebridge, I |
− | rather think one is probably making Noisebridge too much of your life, | + | do rather think one is probably making Noisebridge too much of your |
− | and need a break anyway. | + | life, and need a break anyway. |
− | I also strongly believe the following points represent a consensus | + | I also strongly believe the following points represent a consensus |
− | position at this point, although it isn't the sort of thing that we put | + | position at this point, although it isn't the sort of thing that we |
− | through official consensus, it's definitely something that fits with | + | put through official consensus, it's definitely something that fits |
− | what most of us do when we're | + | with what most of us do when we're do-ocratically handling these |
+ | situations. | ||
− | 1. If you're in an argument with somebody that seems irresolvable and | + | 1. If you're in an argument with somebody that seems irresolvable and |
− | looks like it's escalating, you or they should ask the other to leave | + | looks like it's escalating, you or they should ask the other to leave. |
− | + | It's okay for both sides to do that, because that gets the | |
− | that gets the confrontation out of the space, and gives time for people | + | confrontation out of the space, and gives time for people to calm down. |
− | to calm down. | ||
− | 2. It's considered excellent to leave | + | 2. It's considered excellent to leave. It counts in your favor. |
− | in your favor. | ||
− | 3. Not leaving isn't excellent, because at that point at least one | + | 3. Not leaving isn't excellent, because at that point at least one |
person is stuck in an immediately intractable problem. | person is stuck in an immediately intractable problem. | ||
− | 4. Neither is it excellent to leave, and coming back before | + | 4. Neither is it excellent to leave, and coming back before resolving |
− | should thou take over an hour leaving and then hover around the gate, | + | the conflict. Nor should thou take over an hour leaving and then hover |
− | very slowly picking up your laptop pieces, | + | around the gate, very slowly picking up your laptop pieces, as happened |
− | time. | + | with “Junior” that last time. |
− | 5. It's almost certainly not excellent, incidentally, to try and game | + | 5. It's almost certainly not excellent, incidentally, to try and game |
− | this by just repeatedly asking people to leave and | + | this by just repeatedly asking people to leave and seeking mediation. |
− | + | There are many other exploits like this that you can think of. Almost | |
− | + | all of them fall under another widely-held hackerspace axiom, "don't | |
− | this that you can think of. Almost all of them fall under another | + | be a dick", and won't get you any credit when you gloat with a big |
− | widely-held hackerspace axiom, "don't be a dick", and won't get you any | + | grin on your face. Indeed, you may find that the person who did the |
− | credit when you | + | asking to leave will be in far bigger disgrace than the person who |
− | Indeed, you may find that the person who did the asking to leave will be | + | left. This has actually happened. A lot. |
− | in far bigger disgrace than the person who left. This | ||
− | + | 6. If you feel ABSOLUTELY outraged about being kicked out, it is almost | |
− | + | certain that other people will feel ABSOLUTELY OUTRAGED on your behalf, | |
− | on your behalf, or perhaps roll their eyes at what happened. It is a | + | or perhaps roll their eyes at what happened. Please seek mediation. It |
− | good way to see how the rest of the community feels. It is very unlikely | + | is a good way to see how the rest of the community feels. It is very |
− | that if you are asked to leave for a dumb reason that the rest of the | + | unlikely that if you are asked to leave for a dumb reason that the rest |
− | + | of the community will sympathise with the person telling you to leave. | |
− | do, perhaps your OUTRAGE was misplaced. | + | If they do, perhaps your OUTRAGE was misplaced. |
− | + | 7. And yes you are part of a community, and your big "nobody tells *me* | |
− | what to do" isn't actually the anarchism we practice here. Otherwise you | + | what to do" isn't actually the anarchism we practice here. Otherwise you |
− | could just turn the place into a satanic ice cream parlor and everyone | + | could just turn the place into a satanic ice cream parlor and everyone |
− | would be like woooo anarchy, which they would not. Well, maybe at first, | + | would be like woooo anarchy, which they would not. Well, maybe at first, |
− | but then they would be like why are these arduinos vanilla flavored and | + | but then they would be like why are these arduinos vanilla flavored and |
melting, and the crying would begin. | melting, and the crying would begin. | ||
+ | |||
</pre> | </pre> |
Latest revision as of 19:39, 1 March 2022
Noisebridge | About | Visit | 272 | Manual | Contact | Guilds | Resources | Events | Projects | 5MoF | Meetings | Donate | (Edit) |
Manual | Visitors | Participation | Excellence | Do-ocracy | Consensus | Standards | Outreach | Operations | Cleaning | Edit | Cat |
Excellence | Guidelines | Conflict Resolution | Anti-Harassment | Mental Wellness | Edit |
Conflict Resolution | Restorative Communication | Ask To Disengage | Ask To Leave | Mediation | Unexcellence | Vigilance | 86 | Edit |
Ask To Leave Policy: If someone behaves in a way that makes you feel unsafe or attempts at diffusing an argument fail and it escalates, you can ask a person to leave.
1. If you're in an argument with somebody that seems irresolvable and looks like it's escalating beyond attempts at dropping it or Conflict Resolution, you or they can ask the other to leave. It's okay for both sides to do that, because that gets the confrontation out of the space, and gives time for people to calm down. 2. It's considered excellent to leave. It counts in your favor. 3. Not leaving isn't excellent, because at that point at least one person is stuck in an immediately intractable problem. 4. Neither is it excellent to leave, and coming back before resolving the conflict. More clarifying points 5-7 on this follow. |
See also:
- Unexcellent - A page to link to people (noisebridge.net/unexcellent) as you're walking them to the door after asking them to leave
- Conflict Resolution
- Mediation
- Community Standards
- 86 - a list of people that are no longer welcome at Noisebridge
Guidelines[edit]
(Here's some perspective excerpted from the Noisebridge mailing list ...)
(This guidance was updated to concur with post-Noisebridge-Reboot policies. Historically, many community problems were handled at our weekly Tuesday meetings, but these discussions became too drama-filled, and we now use other methods. Please see the links, above, for our current ways of handling problems.)
https://www.noisebridge.net/pipermail/noisebridge-discuss/2013-March/034846.html
[...] one of the reasons why the Noisebridge tradition has emerged over the years of asking people to leave is to defuse immediate situations. It doesn't mean anything more than some matter has arisen that the people involved feel uncomfortable handling on their own, and would rather discuss it with the wider community. It's not intended as a punishment. Indeed, if one feels outraged that one will have to spend a maximum of seven days not at Noisebridge, I do rather think one is probably making Noisebridge too much of your life, and need a break anyway. I also strongly believe the following points represent a consensus position at this point, although it isn't the sort of thing that we put through official consensus, it's definitely something that fits with what most of us do when we're do-ocratically handling these situations. 1. If you're in an argument with somebody that seems irresolvable and looks like it's escalating, you or they should ask the other to leave. It's okay for both sides to do that, because that gets the confrontation out of the space, and gives time for people to calm down. 2. It's considered excellent to leave. It counts in your favor. 3. Not leaving isn't excellent, because at that point at least one person is stuck in an immediately intractable problem. 4. Neither is it excellent to leave, and coming back before resolving the conflict. Nor should thou take over an hour leaving and then hover around the gate, very slowly picking up your laptop pieces, as happened with “Junior” that last time. 5. It's almost certainly not excellent, incidentally, to try and game this by just repeatedly asking people to leave and seeking mediation. There are many other exploits like this that you can think of. Almost all of them fall under another widely-held hackerspace axiom, "don't be a dick", and won't get you any credit when you gloat with a big grin on your face. Indeed, you may find that the person who did the asking to leave will be in far bigger disgrace than the person who left. This has actually happened. A lot. 6. If you feel ABSOLUTELY outraged about being kicked out, it is almost certain that other people will feel ABSOLUTELY OUTRAGED on your behalf, or perhaps roll their eyes at what happened. Please seek mediation. It is a good way to see how the rest of the community feels. It is very unlikely that if you are asked to leave for a dumb reason that the rest of the community will sympathise with the person telling you to leave. If they do, perhaps your OUTRAGE was misplaced. 7. And yes you are part of a community, and your big "nobody tells *me* what to do" isn't actually the anarchism we practice here. Otherwise you could just turn the place into a satanic ice cream parlor and everyone would be like woooo anarchy, which they would not. Well, maybe at first, but then they would be like why are these arduinos vanilla flavored and melting, and the crying would begin.