When someone says something outrageously funny or weird, it goes on the memorable quotes list or it gets the hose again.
Most recent are on top.
- Jake: Enjoy the hell that you've helped to create!
- lemonkey: GOOD MORNING
jynn-: WHAT JUST HAPPENED
jynn-: OH GOD
- aestetix: dude where's my ops
aestetix: give me status or give me death
- VonGuard: As a result, I know exactly who is trolling when.
- setient: i just realized how awesome it is to have your own office
miah: put your pants back on
- rubin110: Please fill out and submit this form to the party comity and directory in order to run your party.
- aestetix: Atala: even better, how about a illustration of Jacque de Molay's execution?
- wiretapped: .sql select count(*) from dongs where url like 'http://cache.boston.com%'
noisesql: wiretapped: 0
wiretapped: dr_jesus: see that? I didn't get a () from my delete!
noisesql: I hunger for flesh
wiretapped: uh oh
- dr_jesus ran a mile once
dr_jesus: these days I just build sand castles instead and wait for some tough guy to kick them over, then I chessbox him
- miah: i think im a level 2 emoquiter
- alxndr: damn, I hope I don't bust up giggling next time someone unzips my fly because I'm thinking "HULL BREACH!! MAN YOUR BATTLESTATIONS! AAAOOOOOOGAAH"
- aestetix: I think I now have professional java experience
aestetix: and I hate the langugage even more
Epsas: single short amaerican plz
vorstyles: is that a coffee order, or are you on okcupid?
- PuppyCock: so, how do you dispose of a body?
vorstyles: puppycock: i'd suggest dropping the body at noisebridge hq with a tag saying "for parts"
vorstyles: it'll get used in various projects
- aestetix: I just finished jerking off to the last page of anne frank's diary
- Destri: there is sometimes a fine line between "protesting" and "terrorist action"
ani-: there's sometimes a fine line between your mom and terrorist action
- vorstyles: i hate this economy
vorstyles: gives people too much freetime for protests
- PuppyCock: Maddox was right
- alienvenom: what are you interested in? bestiality, s&m?
alienvenom: you an ABDL?
lemonkey: i enjoy feeling creamed corn between my buttcheeks
lemonkey: as if i shat myself
- thermburglar: i have a math penis, does that count
thermburglar: its uncut, so as to function as a slide rule as well
- miah: or maybe i'm misisng the humor again
miah: maybe we should implement a humor tag into irc
miah: or write a bot that detects humor to alert us
- ani: i totally want some httpspanties
vorstyles: panties with a .htaccess
lemonkey: you know it's only a matter of time before our underware starts tweeting
- Kelly: I'm trying to make a point of relating to non-geeks as if they too were human.
- Jim: I like being senile, it's like being drunk without the hangover.
- lemonkey: http://twitpic.com/153mju
lemonkey: final shuttle pin
JSharp: nearly 30 years is a very long time for a program like that :)
JSharp: not a bad design
JSharp: heh, the pin I mean
- turkshead: Dr. J has offered to quantify my gizmo with his phone.
- alienvenom: i suspect that the people who work at muni do not, in fact, have a brain.
solidsnack: alienvenom: But do they have a heart?
solidsnack: I think I'm most like the cowardly lion.
- miah: vagina dentata should be standard equipment for female soldiers
- aestetix: I seriously think phone booths need to start popping up all over america
- dr_jesus: I'm just happy that I wrote a robot squad that helps teach people programming languages, the details are kind of a minor point for me
DrShiny: dr_jesus: that's so... so... SELFLESS of you
DrShiny: "I'm just glad to do my bit to make the world a better place"
dr_jesus: awesome buy me a hookers and blow
DrShiny: "<self-deprecating moue>"
- aestetix: FUCK
aestetix: MUST FEED CHOCOLATE ADDICTION
aestetix: BRB PEANUT BUTTER TWIX OR BUST
- Destri: new levels of bachelor-hood. Left coat in car, coat has my my titanium spork, need spork to stir my instant coffee
- zedd: Come on, Zedd for ED, he gets things up
ani: ani for ed, she puts things down
- wiretapped: aestetix: it turns out that for most intents and purposes, the internet *is* a big truck
- DrShiny: wait, say all that again, i spilled soup on my keyboard so i couldn't hear you
- dr_jesus: when a child dies and has NOT been daemonized (into a completely new process group), the child zombifies because the kernel needs to keep the child data structures around in case the parent wants to look at them to figure out why the child died
dr_jesus: ONLY WHEN the parent process calls wait() or a similar routine to extract that information does the kernel clean up the child data structures, since now the parent has them and can start poring over them to figure out what happened and what to do about it
dr_jesus: now the parent might not want to sit around all day waiting for its kids to die, so the kernel sends SIGCHLD to the parent so whatever the parent is doing can be interrupted and it can call wait() at that point to figure out 1) who died, and 2) what caused it
dr_jesus: so basically SIGCHLD is child protection services and the kids are suicidal
dr_jesus: and a zombie process is a foster kid with a big tattoo on its forehead saying EXIT CODE = 0xwhatever and cps keeps it around waiting for the deadbeat parent to show up and get the exit code
- alienvenom: yes, they would in theory be able to measure the capacitance of a penis
- rachel-: no, when i'm 91, i'm gonna stick wine bottles up my ass
- TheScott: we are having a wi party at VonGuards house because his wife went to Disney land
TheScott: apparently he can't fulfill her fantasy life or requirements
- ryan-c: oh, hey. I've been looking for that penis bouquet pic for a while
- Valkyrie: I did some work in saltmines in Utah. They were rather unpleasant, but not horrible.
- epsas: i miss shitting in the woods
epsas: in my bear costume
- dr_jesus: bwahhaha
dr_jesus: oracle backwards is el caro
epsas: does that mean something?
epsas: ahh - hehe
dr_jesus: "the expensive"
- epsas: you have to fellate the chicken
- epsas: we need a fighterjetbot
epsas: i like looking at fighter jets
epsas: they are, like, flying dongs with guns
- Evil-Bill: noisecloud: find Sarah Connor
noisecloud: Evil-Bill: I don't understand 'find Sarah Connor'.
Evil-Bill: Well that's a relief.
- miah: how many blocks could a noisebridge member block if a noisebridge member could block blocks
- dr_jesus: shut up for a second, I'm committing a sin against mankind
- rachel-: it's a hard time to be a terrorist
- DrSyzygy:: "While the joint work to immanetize the eschaton was certainly eye-opening and pleasant, I really would have liked more of the material on acausal influencing, and at least some differential algebraic topology.
magpie-: i have a 3.8 GPA. what?
- Evil_Bill: C has no objects (only zuul).
- ani: you do realise the wheels made it rollable right?
- dr_jesus: noiseelisp: eval (message user-login-name)
noiseelisp: dr_jesus: root
dr_jesus: god fucking dammit not again
- dr_jesus: I also heard that the sewer system is based on alien wormhole technology and the poop timing has to be coordinated to avoid causing a grandfeces paradox
grelli: you... you're not supposed to know about that
grelli: are you after our beaver technology??
- radii: I'm stuck with keeping ani and turkshead from turning the whole thing into a kumbayah steampunk vibrator singalong.
- Martyn: Where did this whole dong meme come from, anyway?
- rachel-: oh man I want multiple inheritance SO MUCH
aestetix: rachel-: are you poly? cause that could happen
aestetix: Find a bunch of old dirty guys and marry them
- incekt: all i know is it's 40 ms away
incekt: as the crow flies
- dr_jesus: noisec: eval printf("%i", getuid());
noisec: dr_jesus: 0
- rachel: the dong link list is not very long as yet
- epsas: IF YOU MISSED THE PUNCHLINE, WILLIE NELSON WAS GIVING DOLLY PARTON ORAL PLEASURE
- dr_jesus_: rm has a hardcoded check to prevent removing /
alienvenom: no it doesn't
dr_jesus_: sure it does, try it
alienvenom: the -rf overrides it
alienvenom: i've done it before
- Sargun: I wonder if you could make a strap on for people who already have dongs
- aestetix: maybe a goatee sniffing context too?
- ani-: rachel-: like all campaign promises, i can almost guarantee that it will never actually happen
- voronika: at that point, you've missed the bitching bus
- alienvenom: man i wish i was uncut.
alienvenom: just saying :-P
ieatlint: we were just having a moment of silence for your foreskin
- rachel: eljepe: i see your point and raise you SHUT UP
- aestetix: Can someone explain to me in one sentence what "agile programming" is?
oao: it's like knowing you have to drive to some city on the east coast and setting out without a map but with a phone that you can use to ask people questions along the way.
- zedd: can't breathe lulzing too hard
- Valkyrie: Atala: how big is your vagina?
- aestetix: So, somewhere near the top of the list of people "You don't want to piss off (™)"
aestetix: Up there with Hitler's ghost and Your mom
aestetix: I think would include the people who did the construction work at Noisebridge
aestetix: They're pretty badass
- dr_jesus: btw I'm still planning on putting current meters on, as soon as I can convince someone not to rip them out because you can't read keystrokes off a battery powered laptop at the space using a 1Hz sample rate on a 10 bit ADC hooked up to the mains current sensor
- Crutcher: Then they came for the Assholes - and there was no one left to speak for me.
- >> Valkyrie` points out that bongs and other devices can be used to smoke a variety of plant matter, from tobacco to sage.
VonGuard: so what the hell coudl you even use em for?
wiretapped: we're using them on an append-only MyISAM db right now
- Anonymous: I wish that rubin would just leave his natural regional endowments alone, I think that he would just be beautiful with long natural regional endowments. I have always had a great respect for nature.
- Martyn: water for -northern- california comes in large part from Hetch Hetchi, which used to be a valley as large and as beautiful as Yosemite
ieatlint: not as beautiful
Martyn: it was equally as beautiful
ieatlint: don't let the environmentalists fool you
- rigel: so every time i import MySQLdb it says its deprecated
rigel: what should i be using instead?
- Valkyrie: Well, dongs are a dime a dozen.
Valkyrie: Space is rare.
- VonGuard: scott will never finish the bathroom. you idiots made him a member. if he ever is in danger of getting fired for not finishing the bathroom, he will block
- JSharp: all your anomalies are belong to deviation. you are on your way to normalization, make your sigma.
- Rubin: OK, I can't tell which one is rum, I'm done for the night.
- turkshead: guys, i went ahead and painted the consensus process green.
turkshead: everybody likes green, right?
shkoo: the consensus process must be blue.
- Kripto: I avoid Folsom St Fair.. its my b-day weekend and the last thing I need is 50000 people all wanting to give me b-day spankings.
- Martyn: Atala : Mental image -- Alienvenom, ieatlint, Jason, and Mike K all masturbating in wooden chairs. (revenge!)
ieatlint: Martyn, ouch... i'm going to take that personally
Martyn: ieatlint : Dude, I love you, but I never ever want to see you play the skinflute.
ieatlint: fine fine
Martyn: ieatlint : I'm sure the sentiment is returned :)
ieatlint: but you don't need to make the same decision for the rest of noisebridge
Martyn: ieatlint : Okay, okay .. fair enough. If you -really- want to, you can hypothetically masturbate for the non-extant construction crew :)
- aestetix: fuck I started reading about the cat and totally forgot what I was gonna do but the kitty is so nice and cuddly awww
- froggytoad: so... thing is, he has a thing for bears...
Atala: i have a gorilla suit you could borrow. not sure that would work, but maybe worth a try? please clean it after though.
- JSharp: Clippy: "I see you're trying to start an edit war. Would you like me to load a godwin macro?"
- dr_jesus: at the moment he's so far out of compliance that the city is going to get a new TV's worth of fines out of his ass for being so shady
- Zedd: Jeffery, why are you wearing fibreglass as a fashion accessory?
- ioerror: 99% of the police make the rest look bad
- eljepe: ie your pipes are full of rats
eljepe: your walls are full of cats
eljepe: and there is a homeless man living in your elevator
chu: If he's living in the elevator is he really homeless?
- ani-: hm, looks like no one has any records of a tesla turbine in the guinness book of world records
>> ani- submits
>> Evil-Bill dominates
- noisercode: ani- beats dusek with a government entitlement and some nuts and bolts to hold my OTO meetings in 2169 for breakfast at-this-moment
- dr_jesus: ow
dr_jesus: some blind dude rocking out on his headphones just beaned me with his cane
- ieatlint: unconfirmed report says a pipe bomb has gone off inside without injuries
MrDomino: yeah, sounds like... *tic*... the semester's off to a bang...
>> ani- slaps MrDomino with a humungous trout
>> MrDomino masturbates furiously to his pun
- Emflamed: guys.......i know wat sex is.........i dont like listening about it .... or talking bout it...... or watching it (never have) , so please stop, and i dont need a seed wife just for sex!, cuz i dont want sex!
- rachel-: and now i have fresher breath, i sleep better, and my penis is much longer
- teratoma: perhaps noisebridge can hack BART to run without employees
- dr_jesus: noisecode: eval os.geteuid()
noisecode dr_jesus: 0
- >> SanMehat blew a transformer
iz: did he at least buy you dinner first?
- ieatlint: yeah, i somehow doubt i could ever bring myself to have that kind of thing (penis piercing) done...
Atala: ieatlint: you're single right now, yes?
ieatlint: Atala, yes.
Atala: ieatlint: now's the time! if that thing isn't going to get some use, might as well bling it out.
- ceren: ps: do not feed your pierced penis to a baby.
- >> ani- puts on pants
rachel-: ani-: nooooooooooooo
- Atala: yeah, what's been up with the pacific northwest hitting bbq temperatures?
lemonkey: god's wrath for Microsoft bing
- rubin110: So Andy was wearing the tightest pants earlier today at the wedding.
rubin110: His ass looked sooo good.
rubin110: You didn't hear this from me.
- rubin110: IF WE GET A SPACE BEFORE I'M BACK FROM MINNEAPOLIS, I WILL MOVE ALL OVER 83C THERE ON MY BACK.
rubin110: ER ALL OF
VonGuard: [21:18] <rubin110> IF WE GET A SPACE BEFORE I'M BACK FROM MINNEAPOLIS, I WILL MOVE MY BOWELS ALL OVER 83C THERE AND ON MY OWN BACK.
- rubin110: Wait.
rubin110: Why don't we have the makerbot just print us a new space?
- ani-: http://theplanetshop.blogspot.com
zaius: hot! i'd wear that
zaius: ... if i was a girl, i mean
- There was a David Fine bonanza - which got its own page.
- froggytoad: apparantly the dust turns to acid, when you add water. I haven't tried it yet.
- dr_jesus: clearly you have not witnessed the full power of this fully armed and operational asian counterfeiting operation
- VonGuard: oh, hey, tell miloh we figured out how to sex his lizard
- Atala: were they asking you to get fucked in the ass by a machine for money?
- lemonkey: mm jerk chicken quesadillas
iz: they are extra delicious because you know the chicken was a real asshole when alive
- froggytoad: fish guts have this excellent quality of bringing solids out of solutions
- -- Let it hereby also be noted that PNAC stands for Pvck's Neutron Absorbent Cock.
- Nana: Rat poison is never the solution.
- lemonkey: stop, drop, and rofl
- dr_jesus: If you get me that board, I will develop quad core pants.
- VonGuard: "welcome to apple, here's your new liver, an ipod, and an ounce of heroin"
- Atala: ieatlint: sucking cock for crack doesn't count ;P
ieatlint: Atala, it wasn't for crack
- ieatlint: yeah, we need a pigeon hacking class at noisebridge
- vniow-rachel-: i am an unholy breed of hot lesbian and craftiness!
- Atala: i wish i could eat in the same way i masturbate - whenever the hell i feel like it, going for as long between as i feel like. though it would be sad if i couldn't eat in public, that would be annoying.
- Valkyrie: I remember a job interview I went on where they had decided that this "IP" business was not the way to go so they were ripping out all their ethernet and replacing it with RS232 and x.25.
- San: "I still fucking hate Keanu Reeves"
- ryanc-: i need more sex toys
vniow: me too
- aestetix: vniow: do you want me to bring the rape game by Noisebridge tonight?
- alienvenom: '/win goto #gaysf
alienvenom: everyone type /clear now please :)
- vniow: god, i sound like a noisebridge slut
Dr. Jesus: vniow: I don't think you're a slut
vniow: i've slept with ceren too, as of last night
Dr. Jesus: ok, now I do
- leif: It's not as wiki as it could be.
- Martyn: That dildo is going to see more action that a pornstar at Kink.com
Martyn: You're going to have to start laser-etching the names of people who have used it on it
Atala: there is definitely an appeal to being able to say "yeah, that steampunk vibrator you saw on boing boing? i fucked that."
- Valkyrie`: So I'm thinking about going to this gothic rocket thing tonight.
- Valkyrie`: eh. We already got a "go kill yourself" post... over EMAIL ETIQUETTE!
Valkyrie`: It's a little surreal.
- Dr. Jesus: Ok, the federal government is IMing me now.
- anonymous: Being in noisebridge feels like being surrounded by gnomes and unicorns.
- Jake: Dr. Jesus, I have no epenis.
- aestetix : Nine minutes left. That's enough time to do some coke.
- Jake: Police are like vampires, you never invite them into your home.
- Skye: I'm like Pavlov for slovenliness.
- Steen: If you keep taking those you're going to train me to just leave them there.