[Noisebridge-discuss] Tomorrow night's meeting [Oh you know if it's me it's drama]

Justin Doerr justinsfca at gmail.com
Mon Apr 9 17:39:23 PDT 2012


I welcome feedback, and I do want to come in and start hacking. My project
involving making my tablet PC is of significant importance to me especially
since I don't have a computer anymore because I took it apart at
Noisebridge and salvaged only the parts that I needed for making a touch
screen tablet. My primary intentions are not to start drama, and I'm not
just *saying that* as a way to excuse myself, I really mean it. However, I
can't wait around forever for Robert to feel comfortable enough to follow
through with the process of mediation of in which everyone except Robert,
and including myself wants us to go about doing. I admit I'm on the fence
of going about the mediation process. I'm only doing it because the
community wants me to, not because I want to. I simply feel as if he is
being hypocritical for accusing me of things he is entirely capable of
doing himself, if not worse, and yet I'm the one being subjected to threats
of being banned from the space, when he himself gets let off with no
penalty of any sort whatsoever? I just don't think it's fair at all. To me,
there is a significant difference between spitting on people and trying to
stab them, and I only bring that up because I want to shed light upon the
fact that Robert is just as capable of being violent and irrational as I am
when under the heavy influence of alcohol (and in his case, alcohol and
drugs), and I think it's wrong to have mercy upon him entering the space
yet to grimace upon the idea of me being allowed to come back in. Drinking
in the hackerspace is wrong, given Noisebridge should be a space where one
comes in to grow brain cells rather than kill them off, and I've sought
solace for that by attending AA meetings and therapy. I am aware that what
I did was stupid and wrong, and I'm seeking help, which is more than I feel
he can say. He has done nothing, but manages to complain about some other
BS regarding the improper usage of a projector via discuss which again is
something he himself is yet again just as capable of improperly using
himself. I think Robert is an asshole, and the very last thing I want to do
while I am at Noisebridge is consort or communicate with him whatsoever. I
want him to leave me alone and to never talk to me again quite honestly,
because I feel that although what I did was stupid, his actions during and
prior to my episode are just as unforgivable as well.
To summarize, I am thoroughly discontent with the way this process is being
handled. I think that Robert should leave and not be allowed to come back
until he is ready to go through the mediation process as well, or I feel
that both of us should be allowed to coexist with one another in the space,
or that we immediately go through the process of mediation as in tomorrow,
not two or three months from now. At this point I have no sympathy as to
whether or not he feels ready, especially with the way I feel I've been
mistreated by him. Any other proposals to me are unjust, because it
involves Robert being allowed to fool around at the space, or waste his
time accusing others of things he does himself, while I get to be
ostracized and vilified.... Noisebridge is just as much my adult playground
for learning and growing as a person as it is his and ours. The only reason
why I want to go to tomorrow's meeting is to bring this up, because I know
I can't rely on anyone else but myself to represent me, and quite frankly
I'm really over the drama and I'm ready to move on. I've already informed
him that I intend to go to tomorrow's meeting and that if he doesn't feel
comfortable, he doesn't have to attend.
- Justin

On Mon, Apr 9, 2012 at 2:24 PM, rachel lyra hospodar <rachelyra at gmail.com>wrote:

> hello,
>
> i unfortunately will not be available to attend this meeting, however i
> do have a problem with this approach and would suggest that mediation
> would be a good step PRIOR to reentering the space.
>
> Justin, you often say you are willing to learn and yet here you are,
> excusing yourself instead of apologizing, talking instead of hacking,
> and i for one am disappointed at the approach you are taking and do not
> think it is appropriate for you to come to the meeting.
>
> R.
>
> On 4/9/2012 12:22 PM, Justin Doerr wrote:
> > So I am giving everyone fair warning in advance that I plan to attend
> > tomorrow night's meeting prior to the mediation process between Robert
> > Chu and I being complete. I want to share my sentiments and how I feel a
> > month after the drama has passed and I feel I have the right to defend
> > myself and voice my opinion, especially considering how hung over and
> > traumatized I was at the last meeting. I've informed Robert I'm coming
> > and I don't want people to be alarmed, hence this email. Also, it would
> > be great if the drama in the meeting notes would be reduced to as
> > minimal detail as possible, as much as I love being a celebrity here, I
> > admit I'm not interested in this being publicized for everyone's
> > leisure. I can't wait until I can actually get to hacking and not have
> > to ever post drama on the discuss list or other forms of media ever
> > again. It's seriously like an episode of Ricki Lake here sometimes.
> > That's all I have to say. Thanks.
> >
> > -Justin Patrick Doerr
> >
> >
> >
> > _______________________________________________
> > Noisebridge-discuss mailing list
> > Noisebridge-discuss at lists.noisebridge.net
> > https://www.noisebridge.net/mailman/listinfo/noisebridge-discuss
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