[Noisebridge-discuss] Fwd: Some interesting thoughts on "benevolent sexism"

Lyra elevin at MIT.EDU
Fri Apr 5 23:22:57 UTC 2013

Naomi, you are of course welcome to keep fighting with him. I just don't
find that fun or useful, so I won't.

Rachel Lyra! Very true. That being said, we can (and should) work to
improve ourselves and our world simultaneously. It seems there are
different hosts benevolent (or not so) sexism may reside in and different
ways to combat it in each case.

For ourselves, the hard part is noticing. This would be made far easier if
it were more socially okay for people to call us out on such behavior. For
example, a friend mentioned to me that when I used the word 'dick' for a
mean person, I was  reinforcing the idea of men being synonymous with
jerks. I'm glad he was comfortable with telling me that, as it gave me the
opportunity to change my behavior in some small, positive way.

Rational people whose opinions we care about can be reasoned with and
irrational people who's opinions carry no personal value can be ignored.
But what about people who hold these beliefs unreasonably and for some
reason, their opinion must be worked around (policy makers, cultural
leaders, teachers, bosses, investors...)?

Lyra Rachel Levin

Sent en route, pardon the brevity.
On Apr 5, 2013 4:07 PM, "rachel lyra hospodar" <rachelyra at gmail.com> wrote:

> Thanks for this, Lyra!  I think there are a bunch of good ways to move
> forward on issues of embedded sexist behaviors.  Ultimately the question of
> what to do next depends on who the speaker is.  We all have work we can do
> within ourselves, and the old advice about tending to the beam in one's own
> eye first rings pretty true here.  Sometimes I think the most fruitful
> thing for most of us to do is to encourage the normalization of a critical
> analysis and discussion of these issues, as a normal and rational part of
> public discourse.
> R.
> On 4/5/2013 4:01 PM, Lyra wrote:
>> So I tend to just write off people like Garrett Smith - their opinion is
>> not useful or valid to me so why waste cycles feeding the trolls?
>> However, Merlin's link on Stereotype Threat clarified what is bad about
>> that behavior. This isn't a small, vocal, but ultimately powerless group
>> that thinks this way. This is a lot of people, some very intelligent,
>> some very powerful.
>> Instead of bothering with this  fruitless argument with Garrett, let's
>> look at ways we can combat the source of the problem. Calling people out
>> on unnoticed bad behavior is one way. Pro active and empowering
>> education opportunities are an excellent one too (for adults and
>> especially for children). Further thoughts?
>> Lyra
>> Sent en route, pardon the brevity.
>> On Apr 5, 2013 3:46 PM, "Danny O'Brien" <danny at spesh.com
>> <mailto:danny at spesh.com>> wrote:
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