[Noisebridge-discuss] Fwd: Some interesting thoughts on "benevolent sexism"

Snail snailtsunami at gmail.com
Fri Apr 5 23:38:23 UTC 2013

On Fri, Apr 5, 2013 at 4:22 PM, Lyra <elevin at mit.edu> wrote:

> Rational people whose opinions we care about can be reasoned with and
> irrational people who's opinions carry no personal value can be ignored.
> But what about people who hold these beliefs unreasonably and for some
> reason, their opinion must be worked around (policy makers, cultural
> leaders, teachers, bosses, investors...)?
> Lyra Rachel Levin
An example:

I have had a boss who espoused the same BS about male and female brains. To
my face. Like it was not a big deal. Even though he agreed that I was at
least good at my job. >_< Plus a bunch of other crazy shit he'd say. If we
sit down and chat over some tea sometime I can tell you some crazy shit.

So, those situations are more difficult. What is the best solution? Even I
haven't figured that out. You can try to reason with him, but he thinks
he's right about everything and doesn't consider your opinions valid by
default. You can appeal to your boss's boss so that he stops speaking his
mind in front of you, even though it's not changed. You can quit and find a
happier place to work. You can set his desk on fire, which would get YOU in
trouble more than HIM. But, you can't avoid having to deal with the
situation in the first place, which is the ideal.

For every person whose opinion I don't really care about, I know there are
people reading and nodding their heads at home going "oh yeah, totally"
because this is what they are used to being told. I say something just in
case one of the lurkers, who has a mind which can be changed, is a person I
will have to work with someday, so they realize these kinds of opinions ARE
they'll be upset by all this heated discussion and go read some feminism
101 lessons to figure out what the fuck is going on.

At some point, you DO have to stop feeding the trolls, when it is apparent
to everyone they are a troll, but actual people who have shitty opinions
are not necessary trolls.

On the other hand, some people don't deserve serious responses.

............. _ at _y
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