Meeting Notes 2011 01 04
(Note, while largely factually accurate, some descriptions of the meeting below may be heavily influenced by our note-taker's untreated Fictionalised Unreliable Narrator Syndrome. Please consult your internal Emperor Norton before taking it too seriously.)
Note-taker: Danny O'Brien
Moderator: Danny O'Brien
It was a total nightmare. First of all, Josh organised this whole "Show and Tell" (Tuesdays, 7.30) thing right before, so instead of limbering up for proper consensus and correct producedure, everyone sat around looking at Mike's ingenious elevator light LED hack and how he planned it, and a new kind of logic analyser that's basically just six wires and a USB connector, and some routers(?). Then they all discussed the hacks they were working on, and some ideas they were mulling, and sought out advice and shared knowledge with their peers.
It was unfortunately so "interesting" that by the time anyone wanted to stop, it was 8.20 already so basically we'd already screwed up the whole rules and procedures of the meeting. Nice job, Josh. _Real_ smooth.
I kept waiting for someone to sue us for this, but they didn't.
Then I tried to get Dr Jesus to head the meeting, because he looks like a natural leader, doesn't he? But he was too busy talking to Gian Pablo about how to repair the Makerbot, and seemed almost happy at shirking his genetic responsibilities.
By 8.30pm I realised that I was going to have to head the meeting "do-acratically" myself before our previously finely-tuned decision-making process descended into unmanageable chaos.
I went and got the member binder and started noisily flicking through it, which I thought would at least shut people up. Finally I worked out how to get the projector screen to come down, but couldn't get the video to work. That attracted a few people's attention who "wanted to help me".
It was time to consense.
 Introduction and Names
UNFORTUNATELY, just when I was getting to bit where I explain to everyone what Noisebridge is, our code of honor, how to get here if you're not here already etc, Miloh started being disruptive and un-excellent and said "Hey, everyone knows this stuff here, right?.
As moderator, I quickly established consensus through a show of hands that everyone indeed knew this stuff.
Miloh then proposed that instead of doing the usual meeting procedure, we should have a guided tour of the space, revealing secrets that many people did not know, even members.
Before I had a chance to even THINK of blocking, everyone bloody consensed on this too.
Look, can I at least read out the binder names? I whined, correctly.
But it was too late, everyone was following Miloh around to see the electronics lab and heard a bunch of so called "secret knowledge" like what a Hell Box is, where you can find Quagga, how easy it would be to program the life-playing Big LED sign to do other stuff, how to get an account on pony, how cool the $500 de-solderer is, how to use John's new flat storage area in the FabLab, how you should put empty bottles by the third sink because we're going to be making a load of Kambucha, pondered on whether we should keep the shrink-wrap machine, learned the secret Masonic History of 2169 Mission, and the true origin of some of Noisebridge's most famous smells.
I tried writing all of this down, but our meeting notes don't even have a category for stuff like this. I therefore ruled myself out of order and deleted it.
I did scribble down everyone's names though, as per procedure, and for purposes of future prosecution. If you want to know these secrets, which go against every principle of openness Noisebridge stands for, you could ask [[ User:Jack|Jack]], Miloh of course, and Carl. Gescykae and John Neurofog were also troublemaking (both of whom don't even have User pages yet, which is I believe a violation of our lease).
 Financial Report
Treasurer Kelly wasn't around, because if she had been, I'm sure this mess-up could NOT HAVE HAPPENED.
Hey guys! I was busy flying into Oakland from Alaska at meeting time. Glad to see the usual chaos ensued without my help. Our aggregate bank balance is $18,118.39. In December, Noisebridge took in $4,360 in dues and $5,675.60 in donations. Way up from a couple months ago! Next week I will have a full report on 4Q10, and we will be discussing our tax receipt backlog as well as looking at new accounting software options.--Hurtstotouchfire 20:03, 7 January 2011 (UTC)
 Membership Binder
No new members, but a bunch of people getting close. Chandra and Jack, turn up to next meeting to be induced into the Academy of People Who Don't Have The Common Decency to Listen When You're Moderating them.
 What's Going On At Noisebridge
Apparently, "everyone knows this shit seriously Danny let it go".
Someone announced they were going off to fix the door-opening mechanism. Everyone wandered off to help. WTF? WE'RE NOT EVEN DONE.
 Consensus Items
None. I suggested we debate banning someone for the space for what they said on noisebridge-discuss that one time, but everyone continued to have "better things to do".
I was pretty much crying at this point.
 Discussion Items
Finally! Andy turned up and pointed out that do need to consense about what voting system to use for the board elections.
Please do this next week, PROPERLY. I have carefully expanded the meeting template documentation so a meeting can never go this far wrong ever ever again.
It is consoling to me you can fix any problem by adding more documentation.
 End of Meeting
I said that I was going home to write up the meeting notes. Miloh said "Hey, can you do it in the form of a mid-nineties cyberpunk novel this time?", and everyone started telling me what kind of awesome character they wanted to be and what tricked out skateboard they would be riding.
You know what? You people totally deserve each other.